Soooo...big announcement.

Well, big announcement for us. As a family. Like a total life changer. But I guess that is the point of something like this.

We are moving back to Austin.

Whew! It's finally out there! Most people who are close to us already know, but I figured instead of answering 5 million individual questions, I would just put it all right here. I will do my best to explain our situation...even though I guess it's not totally necessary. I just feel like there is a message from our journey that others could benefit from. So I will do my best. Here goes!

We moved to Phoenix to engage in an opportunity that we thought would be best for our  family. Financially we would make a lot more money, we would still be around family, and I would be able to teach with my best friend! It was a perfect situation and so we took the risk.

Settling into the move here in AZ was difficult. Mainly because I was pregnant, starting a new job, and business had suddenly (and unfortunately) gotten very slow. Financially, it was difficult at first. We were tested in ways we had never really been tested and had to sacrifice a lot more than we ever were prepared to do. I make about $11,000 less here in AZ. Carlos and I stressed month to month and when Luke had to start daycare, things were slowly getting better but two daycares, two car payments, a rent payment, and just everyday costs was not easy. Personally, I was going through some things with others (I won't get into it here) and I felt alone. Carlos and I had (at the time) jokingly said we couldn't wait to get back to Austin but we figured this was it...this was what we had decided to do and it was our bed to lie in.

Things started to look up. We were able to build a beautiful 2,700 sq ft house with every upgrade we wanted, in a neighborhood desired by many. We moved in, business was up, and things seemed ok. We were excited about settling in and getting to know our neighbors and participating in our communities events. Yet, as the excitement and newness of the situation started to dissipate, we found ourselves still wanting to be back in Austin. It was something that was always in the back of our mind. Something that we always wanted to end up doing but probably not until much later. And then, one day, we hit a breaking point. Like the "wow-we-only-live-once" kind of point. It is hard to explain this kind of realization unless you have experienced something like it. Actually I kinda think it is kind of Carlos' and I's thing. We knew we were in love within weeks of knowing each other and we were engaged within 2 months. We just knew. And in this instance we just know what is right for our family.

We make a lot more money than we did in Austin. We live in a much nicer neighborhood than we did in TX. Our house is a dream house. And you know what?? We are absolutely ok with giving that up for a simpler, less overwhelming way of life. A lot of people don't understand this. They don't get why we would leave if we make more money and own this beautiful house. Really, it is very simple: we have experienced life with less and we have experienced it with "more". But what is "more"? Is is new cars? New clothes? A high paying job? Or is it happiness? And family time? And simplicity? We have chosen the latter. Why in life, is the stigma that if you have more, you are happier? If you own the best things, life is easier? If you have MORE, you must have a perfect life? No one's journey is ever easy. It is never perfect. And the moment you think it is, God decides to flip it around a little to make sure you are paying attention. Paying attention to the important things...the things that make you happy. The things that make you a better person so you can benefit others around you. I never understood this lesson until having gone through these last couple of years.

Some people ask if we regret moving or if we think we have wasted time. My answer is absolutely not. In no way, was this time spent in vain. We learned life lessons that can only be learned by taking this kind of risk. I have learned that my family, my husband and my kids, are the absolute priority in my life. A lot of people can say that but do they truly understand it...understand what that really, REALLY means?  I have learned that having money does not equal happiness and neither does a big house. That keeping things simple is what happiness is made of. If you don't do what makes you happy in this one life you are given, if you try to push a situation that just isn't right, you end up full of regret. So was moving to AZ something I will regret? No. But not going back to Austin would be.

(I used to find myself doing this A LOT. But finding peace with yourself makes that kind of comparison completely useless and really weighs you down. I find much more joy with being happy for others, knowing that their journey is their OWN; not mine.)

In order to make this decision I have felt guilt. Sadness. Grief. Happiness. Joy. I have probably been through the entire gambit of emotions. I am so sad to leave the amazing people I work with. To leave my family. To leave my best friend/lover who has been there for me for 15 years. For my other girls who I love just as much and make me laugh whenever we are together. I will miss their families. I will miss this house. Not because it is a "dream" house but because of all the handprints our children have left on the wall, the memories made jumping on the bed, the bath times, the story times, and all the "I love you's" shared between us four behind these walls. It may have been a short time but it was still time I cherish and hold dear. I know that eventually we will own another home in Austin where we will raise our children. Before this experience I would  have worried about if that home would be "acceptable" enough; if it was on the right side of town or if it was new enough. But now I am excited to find a home that holds our joy, our memories, and our laughter...regardless of how big, new, or "upgraded" it is.

And not to worry! Our family here in Arizona, is supportive of the move. Although Carlos came on board to help expand the business and help my dad, we didn't just up and decide this move without their blessing and LOTS of talking. They of course are sad to see us move but they understand. When I have moments of doubt and ask my mom if I am absolutely nuts, she reassures me...she tells me that she saw a little light go out in me (and Carlos) that was there in Austin. In those times when I doubt myself, and she tells me this, I realize all over again how right this decision is for us. My dad completely understands as well. His business will not suffer. He has a business deal with a friend who is going to buy the business so he can officially retire. God is good and it always works out.


Austin is our home. It is our happy place. It isn't just the place we find so captivating, it's the people. Our friends there. Our family. It is kind of funny how a place does that to you. And some people never experience that "true home" feeling; I feel blessed that we do and we know Austin is our home. Carlos and I "grew up" there as adults, as a married couple, and as parents. We are going back with excitement and also a bittersweet feeling. But...new memories await us and just like any new adventure, we are nervous but filled with hope that this is God's will. I will continue to teach. I am going to get a Masters as soon as I know if I am an in state resident still (we owned a home there this entire time so it's a weird situation). I am going to be a better mom and wife. I can't wait to see old friends and make new ones. I will miss everyone here dearly but I will always have roots in Arizona. There are always two reasons for us to come back and visit: family & friends!

In closing, I have to say that I love my husband. Through all of this, our marriage has been strengthened, when at times it didn't feel like it. We have been through more these last 2 years than we ever thought we would have to experience all at once. Through it all though, we stay committed to one another, we love each other, and we know that this decision is best for our relationship. He is my best friend and my soulmate. The only one that can take my craziness at times and calm me down (ok, well sometimes). Carlos, I love you more than anything. Here is to another new journey...another turn in our path...and I wouldn't want to do it with anyone but you!