Since October 2nd, I have been back at work. I am back in the classroom and it feels good! Admittedly the first week was rough leaving my precious baby boy at daycare but now we are going on 4 weeks and it's getting a little easier. The anticipation I have of picking him up and seeing his drooling, smiling face is indescribable! I look forward to just BEING with him after work. We don't do anything considered "too special"...we just go home and relax and talk (its his new thing...in his 3 month post I am gonna write this weekend, I have a lot of new things he loves to do!) and we just enjoy mommy and son time. It is such a special and important part of my day and his and on the weekends we get to be a family unit, doing family things :) I may sound like a "bad mama" saying this, but sometimes I am ready on Monday to get back to work and be around other adults. It's not that I don't miss Eli or don't want to be around him, its just that dirty diapers get a little old 24 hours a day ;) No....really it just makes our time together more special and perfect. I have something to look forward to EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. and it is marvelous!
Work has been busy and overwhelming in its own rite. Heck, teaching just always is no matter which way you slice it. I am blessed to have awesome friends and coworkers who support me and help me whenever I need it so it makes it bearable at times when I think I can't do it. Balancing being a mommy, wife, teacher, and friend has been challenging...its not easy by any means and it sometimes makes you just want to lock yourself in a closet to have TWO seconds to yourself, but it is getting a little easier to manage. It is all about finding that balance and being flexible and knowing that "the plan" isn't always going to work out and sometimes the house is just gonna be a disaster or those files at school just are not gonna get filed today. Knowing that mommy and daddy time is the 20 minutes at dinner and a quick kiss goodnight. It is all about being ok with what you are doing and not trying to do anything and everything at once. We all know how bad at this I am. But I am getting better. I swear. Ok Ok....kind of getting better. Slowly.
Carlos and I have had a few nights out with each other and other adults since I started back at work. It is nice to have a night or a few hours where we can just relax and not have a truckload of responsibility for a bit. Everyday we make it work and we know it isn't always going to be easy but its worth it. It can be happy. It can be messy. It can be glorious. It's love and whoever says you don't have to work at it is a liar. A straight up liar. Nothing worth your time is every going to be easy. Bringing a baby into a marriage is LIFE CHANGING and it changes the dynamics of a marriage. I think we were a little naive when we thought, "oh it will change but we won't fight over the little things or take out the stress on each other." Um, yeah right. It happens but it's about being forgiving and loving. My husband is my saving grace. I love him and everyday on this journey with him makes me appreciate, admire and love him even more.
Oh, an Eli is doing great! He is getting HUGE. I don't want to write too much about him yet because I have a whole post I am gonna dedicate to him this weekend. But for now, here is a little teaser pic.....
I am 3 months old! And holy cupcakes am I cute!
